Month: June 2023

TL:DR If someone sees their partner’s wants and needs as obligations rather than opportunities, the relationship will fail. For example, Person A asks Person B if they would acknowledge their (A’s) birthday. Person B comes from a background where birthdays are not celebrated, and they don’t see the point, so instead of viewing this request as an opportunity to show their partner love and acknowledgment, it’s seen as an obligation begrudgingly done. I have had multiple male partners who have felt this way and ended up resenting me because I had needs beyond what they were willing to provide. Fair. For a superficial relationship. However, they each wanted maximum gains for themselves with little effort to make sure I felt valued and respected. They would claim they wanted deep emotional connection and then balk at the emotional labor and intelligence required to make that a healthy reality. Instead, they would offer transactional efforts (usually in the form of financial support,

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