How to manage a relationship when you have a chronic illness


The spoonie community is having a debate at the moment. How much should we thank the people who choose to spend their life with someone who has a chronic health condition?

In case you haven’t heard the two sides of the debate, it’s pretty simple.

One side of the argument is that having a partner/spouse with chronic pain massively impacts your life and means you end up as some kind of lover-slash-carer. Chronic illness sufferers should therefore be eternally grateful to the people who stay with us, and give high praise to those who love us in spite of our disabilities.

The other side of the argument is the backlash to the above; people with chronic pain are not some kind of second-rate partner, we’re still human beings with opinions, values, likes and dislikes, and we’re not a project that you deserve a medal for spending time with.

Which side…

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